Chinese One Hundred Day Cough

I have contracted the Chinese 100 Day Cough.

The symptoms are:

Flu like lethargy
Dry mouth
Vertigo
Violent mood swings
Paranoia/fear of death
A Tourettes-like compulsion to shout at total strangers
Aching bones (this may be psychosomatic as bones have no nerves and cannot feel pain)
Outbursts of origami
Secret compositions of Haiku
Choking
A brooding sense of worthlessness
Hording
Coughing for one hundred days
Death