Wednesday, 5 December 2007

Chinese One Hundred Day Cough

I have contracted the Chinese 100 Day Cough.

The symptoms are:

Flu like lethargy
Dry mouth
Vertigo
Violent mood swings
Paranoia/fear of death
A Tourettes-like compulsion to shout at total strangers
Aching bones (this may be psychosomatic as bones have no nerves and cannot feel pain)
Outbursts of origami
Secret compositions of Haiku
Choking
A brooding sense of worthlessness
Hording
Coughing for one hundred days
Death

9 comments:

Socrates Adams-Florou said...

I hope you get well before the hundred days is up. Is it definately fatal?

xtx said...

Be careful...if you happen to have an Origami outburst whilst driving, it could be disastrous.

Frank Morgan said...

Hai,

thanks for your concern dudes, unfortunately the 100 day cough is definitely fatal and as yet, incurable :(

the Chinese government have a team of scientists working on something though so fingers crossed.

Yeah I've had to stop driving be

worker bees can leave
even drones can fly away
the queen is their slave

FUCKSOCKS ARSEBANANA

woah, sorry about that. Where was I, oh yeah I've had to stop driving for that very reason.

apants said...

I caught diabetes from the one hundred day cough and also from off a toilet seat.

Frank Morgan said...

oh god, this is a nightmare, everyone who uses the toilet after me is at risk . . .

Kathy said...

you are funny.

sam pink said...

we can't make-out anymore frank.

Frank Morgan said...

well I should have seen that coming!

stupid cough is ruining everything.

Jenn said...

You're right you know. Thanks for dropping by and spreading the news... cough cough.